Assignments can be difficult or easy for any person. I’m on the difficult end of the scale – but for annoying reasons. I am actually fairly confident in my abilities – I know that I understand my course and if I don’t I will be able to work it out. So what stops me from writing my essays?
Ugh, I’m not sure I even know completely. Maybe something like…
- debilitating perfectionism – I get so scared what I’m writing isn’t the best way to say it, because I feel I am not very good at articulating myself. I write and delete so much that sometimes… I just don’t write anything.
- unable to read – my dissociation and dyslexia interact so terribly that when it comes to reading for my assignments (as they must have references throughout). I get petrified of not being able to back up what I’m saying.
- grades – I know that my knowledge and ability grant me at least a 2:1 if I can articulate it correctly. I get stuck in a panic loop of worrying I won’t be able to get the grade I want. I don’t want to disappoint anyone, or myself.
I still have an essay and a statistics assignment left. In March, I didn’t do an assignment – and I have no idea how debilitating it will be if I can’t resit it.
My plan is to take it one step at a time and do my best. I’ll be okay! Maybe! 😉